It has been quite some time since I wrote anything on this blog. I probably have a dozen excuses for it - none of which are very interesting - so let's just say life got busy.
A relatively boring update - not much is new. Really. Except that there are small things when I think about it and I figured it was about time I got back in touch here.
I'm 11 weeks into being back at the gym after my not so productive August (and lets be honest it was more like mid-July to mid-September). Looking back on it, I still feel a weird sense of guilt for slipping up for so long with no real good excuse. I tend to need an excuse to feel ok with something like that lazy stretch - but I am also not very good at making up good enough excuses that even I would believe. So I don't have any.
11 weeks have gone by since I got back into the gym and I have also been doing a small diet/lifestyle challenge with a few friends for the last 5-6 weeks. There are moments where I look back on the last several weeks and wonder why I ever let myself fall apart. Every day at the gym, ever hour spent meal planning, every cold meal I have eaten while driving, and every new article I have read since being back at it has reaffirmed that this lifestyle was what I was meant to live.
I used to sustain myself on low fat, no fat, low carb, no sugar, artificially sweetened, processed, zero calorie foods. Think Special K bars, Source Yogurt, and Turkey Bacon. And I ran...a lot. Yes I lost all my maternity weight and could run a 10k in under 50 minutes...but I hurt. I was tired and achy all the time. I was obsessed with calories and wouldn't let myself eat much more than 1000 per day. I would justify any indulgence and binge eat quite a bit. And as "thin" as I looked in clothes - I still had my pockets of swelling and lingering fat that just never went away. And I was absolutely not comfortable looking in the mirror.
And then a series of events happened...I got my gym membership and actually went with a strength training plan (without cardio!), joined Search and Rescue (a great passion of mine), started exploring paleo/clean eating, and then met my Trainer. For me - meeting him was a key turning point and since then a whole new approach to my health has been evolving. At first I was just focused on strength training and safety within those exercises. Then came the food changes that demanded I eat more, eat cleaner, and eat less processed foods. Then came mobility work and stretching (which is an ongoing struggle). Then came the emotional and mental self-reflection and goal setting. And all of this is just a start - the tip of the iceberg you might say!
This is the lifestyle I was meant to live. The beautiful thing about saying that out loud is that I actually believe it. I have no intention of this implying that what I practice today will be what I practice tomorrow - especially when it comes to fitness and eating (just ask my father how many times I have changed my approved foods list) - but what I do know is that there is no going back to my old habits.
Every single day presents itself with new challenges, new concepts to explore, and new goals to work towards....but not a single day goes by where I ache like I used to or binge-eat as I so often did. Not a single day goes by where I feel ashamed for the choices I made today (even the four 2-bite brownies I had at a birthday party!) and not a single day goes by that I feel lost. I have come a very long way from where I was and I really look forward to the very long road ahead.
Along the way there have been times where I felt alone, and sometimes I still do. Those feelings are less and less now, mostly because of the strength of my growing support network. Those who make up the center of my support network are people who have motivated my changes and who share similar interests or pursuits with me. And all around me are others who may not share the exact same interest or who may have different struggles then me, but who nonetheless care for me and offer other means of support, friendship, and commonalities. You all know who you are - and without you I would be in a much different place so I am forever grateful. I want nothing more then to share my successes, my new pursuits, and any frustrations with my closest family and friends...but with that comes the risk of overwhelming them or imposing my pursuits upon them. Good intentions I may have, but sometimes I just need to remind myself that my lifestyle is mine alone to create and live.
That being said - another thing that is sort of changing and that is my own strength to be alone with my pursuits if I have to be. I don't really mean alone in the sense that no one supports me - but alone in the sense that I feel strong enough to set my own goals and work towards them on my own. This was the lifestyle I was meant to live - and believing that makes it much easier to do as I need for my goals, because I want to, and for my better wellness. I feel more stable now then I have ever felt before. I am definitely more confident in the choices I make and better equipped when it comes to figuring out how to make them. I am aware of what food does for me, how it makes me feel, its importance to all of my goals, and the consequences of not eating healthy. I am also very happily dependent on exercise (to a healthy degree) - it has never failed to make me feel better or make my day a little brighter. This new found feeling of stability has also given me the ambition to now start planning and implementing changes within my family, more specifically for my daughters. This may be the biggest challenge yet, but we have a lifetime to experiment with it and that is something I really look forward to!
My wellness first. There is so much more to learn and experience and experiment with in this pursuit...but I feel such great excitement with the anticipation of all that is yet to come!!!
R
Monday, December 17, 2012
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Back on track...
I have had a VERY LONG time "off". Who are we kidding? I just plain old got lazy. Lazy at the gym. Lazy in the kitchen. And it showed! So when even my husband comments on how my boobs got bigger over this time period - it becomes a little bit of a sore spot that I left myself soften up so much. Because trust me - this was one of the positive things that happened over the past 6-8 weeks....everything else didn't change for the better!
I know that I am my own worst critic and I will admit I had some pretty dark feelings about myself some days. At the worst of it there were moments that one bite led to a full on binge on all the things that I had cut out for so long! I seriously followed the mantra "screw it" and pretty much gave up. I stopped blogging, I stopped researching, I stopped baking, stopped working out and basically stopped trying. I started eating sugary foods, drinking, over eating, indulging, and sneaking snacks out of the cupboards. I also stopped taking "progress" pictures because at that point I realized they would have been more like "regress" pictures and well there is no pride in that! But as the sugar fog cleared and I snapped out of it - there was also a lot to be learnt from this.
First of all - I have way more respect for the effort it takes to be healthier. It is something that can consume your life in many ways and honestly worth every ounce of energy - but it is also fragile. Effort comes easily when you have goals you are working towards and when you have surrounded yourself with things that fuel that. But effort can easily wane when you find yourself lost, unmotivated and tempted. Effort needs constant attention and nurturing...or else the things that get sacrificed at that point is everything you worked so hard for.
Secondly - I now understand sacrifice. I used to think I was sacrificing things like treats and
comfort foods for the goals I was working towards. Now I understand that when I eat those things or skip the gym that I am actually sacrificing my own aspirations. I get it now - there is a difference between abstinence and sacrifice. Making a choice to not eat something or to eat a certain way requires no sacrifice - just will power and a purpose. And when the moment comes where I may make the choice to savor a treat or indulge a bit - I am not sacrificing my health by doing so. That being said - I am however much more aware that when indulgences and laziness consume me and I become less diligent about my aspirations - I do start to see things being sacrificed. My aspirations are forgotten, my stretching stops, I don't make time for the gym, I binge on things I know are garbage, and I loathe myself. I am willing to abstain from things that don't help me achieve my goals - sacrifice is much bigger than that.
Lastly - I like myself better when I work out and eat better. I haven't felt so shitty, bloated, disgusted, frustrated, angry, and depressed as I did when I was "off". I know there will be times where life will just demand more energy in other areas - but to fall apart so quickly and into so many pieces is not something I want to do again. Let this lesson stay with me forever!
Shit happens. So - I'm over it. I am not consumed with guilt or disgust over my softer abs and bigger boobs (gosh I wish there was a way to keep what little there is of them!). I might be a little pissed at myself when I am back in the gym because my weights have gone down slightly, but that's great motivation too. I really have no one to blame but myself - so it's on me to get past it.
I have reconnected with my trainer, changed my attitude, and am again focused on my aspirations. And damn does it feel good!
I know that I am my own worst critic and I will admit I had some pretty dark feelings about myself some days. At the worst of it there were moments that one bite led to a full on binge on all the things that I had cut out for so long! I seriously followed the mantra "screw it" and pretty much gave up. I stopped blogging, I stopped researching, I stopped baking, stopped working out and basically stopped trying. I started eating sugary foods, drinking, over eating, indulging, and sneaking snacks out of the cupboards. I also stopped taking "progress" pictures because at that point I realized they would have been more like "regress" pictures and well there is no pride in that! But as the sugar fog cleared and I snapped out of it - there was also a lot to be learnt from this.
First of all - I have way more respect for the effort it takes to be healthier. It is something that can consume your life in many ways and honestly worth every ounce of energy - but it is also fragile. Effort comes easily when you have goals you are working towards and when you have surrounded yourself with things that fuel that. But effort can easily wane when you find yourself lost, unmotivated and tempted. Effort needs constant attention and nurturing...or else the things that get sacrificed at that point is everything you worked so hard for.
Secondly - I now understand sacrifice. I used to think I was sacrificing things like treats and
comfort foods for the goals I was working towards. Now I understand that when I eat those things or skip the gym that I am actually sacrificing my own aspirations. I get it now - there is a difference between abstinence and sacrifice. Making a choice to not eat something or to eat a certain way requires no sacrifice - just will power and a purpose. And when the moment comes where I may make the choice to savor a treat or indulge a bit - I am not sacrificing my health by doing so. That being said - I am however much more aware that when indulgences and laziness consume me and I become less diligent about my aspirations - I do start to see things being sacrificed. My aspirations are forgotten, my stretching stops, I don't make time for the gym, I binge on things I know are garbage, and I loathe myself. I am willing to abstain from things that don't help me achieve my goals - sacrifice is much bigger than that.
Lastly - I like myself better when I work out and eat better. I haven't felt so shitty, bloated, disgusted, frustrated, angry, and depressed as I did when I was "off". I know there will be times where life will just demand more energy in other areas - but to fall apart so quickly and into so many pieces is not something I want to do again. Let this lesson stay with me forever!
Shit happens. So - I'm over it. I am not consumed with guilt or disgust over my softer abs and bigger boobs (gosh I wish there was a way to keep what little there is of them!). I might be a little pissed at myself when I am back in the gym because my weights have gone down slightly, but that's great motivation too. I really have no one to blame but myself - so it's on me to get past it.
I have reconnected with my trainer, changed my attitude, and am again focused on my aspirations. And damn does it feel good!
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
SPARTAN!
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| Team "I put out...Effort" |
Race day was perfect in every way! The weather was hot! The crowd was exciting! The porta-potties were decent! We finally all found each other and talked strategy...1:30pm was go time!
This was by far the best experience I have ever had! This event was designed for all levels of willing participants! Some went as hard as they could, some stayed middle of the pack, and some took their time. On the course there was a general sense of comradery between complete strangers in the mud pits and on the trails. The obstacles were hard but not unrealistic and burpees were done on the honor system. And at the end - a medal waiting for everyone!
I would highly recommend everyone to try an event like this! You could go into it without training - with minimal physical stamina - and still have fun. OR you could exercise and work your way through exercises that will prepare you a little more for the obstacles and really kick ass. Either way - it is worth it!
Highlights of the race:
1) Telling my friend Kent at the starting line that it was ok to leave us and go hard! The look on his eye was like a wild dog finally let off the leash....and he rocked it!
2) Meeting up with my long-time friend Erin after more than 2 years and several before that of not seeing each other. Picked up where we left off and felt a little warmth in my heart for a friend I don't see very often. She was the first person who agreed to do this race with me and I am glad that I did the race (or most of it) with her!
3) Mud. It S-T-U-N-K but it was oh so refreshing on what was a very hot day! It was thick and unforgiving at times but with the right strategy (stay low and go quick) it was where I felt I made some progress over others. Plus - it was just pure fun! And I came out with both shoes on!4) Completing the obstacles! Ok so I can't throw a spear! And seriously never thought to practice it...but otherwise I completed all the obstacles - actually with quite a lot of ease. The training I have done over the past few months has definitely paid off and the strength I have developed was a huge asset. Super pumped when I could pick up the sandbag with ease and run the hill, or drag the cinderblock through the deep sand, or scale the wood wall without the help of someone's hands on my ass. I may not have ran the race at full speed - but I was damn proud of doing all the obstacles!
So now what? Race is over and I am still on a high! It really was just that fun! And yet - I have to plan to do it again - next time for time! I have a competitive spirit - and although I have absolutely no regrets with how I ran this race - I know for sure I could have went way faster. To do that I would have to go at it alone - and focus on passing all the walkers and get a little pushy in the obstacles instead of being patient and waiting. So next year - I want to do it twice. Once by myself - in the first heat of the day. And again - a few hours later - just for fun with friends and maybe even my husband (who recognized that he was missing out this day and hopes to do it next year!).
Also - I think I have found what I love to do...events like this give me the reason to strength train and condition myself - without being the sole reason for needing to. It is a goal to work towards - almost like a reward for the "training" but not the sole purpose of the "training".
Next year can't come soon enough!
You'll know at the finish line!
Monday, July 30, 2012
Goodbye and Good Riddance to July!
Oh July! As much as I hate to see time fly so quickly...Im glad July is over.
I was on such a roll! I didn't miss a day in my weekly workouts and I was pretty compliant with my diet. Got my measurements re-evaluated on the 11th to which I was extremely happy with...and then fell apart after that.
I have barely stepped foot in the gym. I could care less about exercising outside. And my diet is the absolute shits.
Enough whining. I have no other excuse other than I allowed it to happen. I stopped making these things a priority and I got slack. And damn is it hard to get back on track!
Spartan is 18 days away...and of all the time I have had this is when I feel the laziest?!? Talk about disappointed in myself. Wallowing in self disgust or pity won't help either. Getting refocused is key here.
But it's the long weekend....
GEEZE! The summer seems to be a never ending opportunity to make lame excuses.
Falling off the wagon will happen - to me it is getting back on that is important. Recognizing all my excuses fuels my determination to get over it all. So I am glad July is over. August has got to be better than July and I am re-focused with the 18th in sight now. Time to get (get back to) serious!
Saturday, July 21, 2012
Health, Strength, Commitment, Family
Recently my husband went to the hospital for an appendectomy. Really - a very normal, common procedure. I honestly wasn't all that worried...until I witnessed a very horrific and real pain attack that I could do nothing to alleviate. With all that being figured out and pain meds being given...I found myself in the gift shop doing what many women find therapeutic...Shopping.
I found these in the hospital gift shop. There will several other ones to choose from, but these are the few that felt right to me and given the time we were going through.
Health - one of the most important things we all too easily take for granted. Myself included. Even a simple appendix inflammation and our whole world is put on hold for a short time. Going through any illness or surgery makes you appreciate your health a little more. And as much as I strive to nurture my own health, even all that I work towards cannot fully prevent such things like appendix problems.
Commitment is a necessity. Sure it can waiver at times but it is an undeniable necessity. You need the commitment to work through the challenges, work towards the goal, and to bring yourself back from fall backs. It doesn't matter if it is a health related goal or just being there for your family, friends, or job - commitment is the difference between an idea and a purpose.
Strength. Sure, working towards and developing physical strength is important. But strength goes beyond muscles. The strength to endure anything and everything. Life is a struggle. It changes daily. And we can never be fully prepared for every little thing it can throw at you. Finding the strength to get through things has a lot to do with your personality, your support system, your commitment, and your resources. For as much as strength can be emotional, you cannot deny that physical strength can offer your body greater capacity to handle stress. Don't underestimate the impact of your physical strength on your emotional strength.
Family. For every joyful experience and every challenge you will go through in life you can be assured your family will be there right along side you. Family can be a large collection of people, most related to you and others not, but regardless "family" means everything in time of need. The generosity that family offers is beyond amazing and one will never fully come to realize just how much individual family members are willing to offer when you need them the most. Beyond the support that family offer to you in a time of need - "family" is also one of the sole reasons for living each day. My children, my husband, my parents, my siblings, my extended family, and my dearest friends are the most important things to me. My commitment to them, my commitment to my health, and the strength it takes all of us as individuals and collectively to get through life is beyond description.
So, I wear these simple rings around my neck now. Every time I touch them or reflect in the mirror - I am reminded of a very real moment where I took the time to reflect on many things that have great impact and importance in my life. My husband is on the mend, and life goes on. But I need to reminded every once and a while to not take these things for granted.
I'm sure over time they will tarnish (they were only $3.98 each at that!) but regardless - for now I am happy with my "make myself feel better" purchase that has come to mean much more than the value of each item.
If you were to choose 4 words to hang around your neck - what would they be? and why?
R
I found these in the hospital gift shop. There will several other ones to choose from, but these are the few that felt right to me and given the time we were going through.
Health - one of the most important things we all too easily take for granted. Myself included. Even a simple appendix inflammation and our whole world is put on hold for a short time. Going through any illness or surgery makes you appreciate your health a little more. And as much as I strive to nurture my own health, even all that I work towards cannot fully prevent such things like appendix problems.
Commitment is a necessity. Sure it can waiver at times but it is an undeniable necessity. You need the commitment to work through the challenges, work towards the goal, and to bring yourself back from fall backs. It doesn't matter if it is a health related goal or just being there for your family, friends, or job - commitment is the difference between an idea and a purpose.
Strength. Sure, working towards and developing physical strength is important. But strength goes beyond muscles. The strength to endure anything and everything. Life is a struggle. It changes daily. And we can never be fully prepared for every little thing it can throw at you. Finding the strength to get through things has a lot to do with your personality, your support system, your commitment, and your resources. For as much as strength can be emotional, you cannot deny that physical strength can offer your body greater capacity to handle stress. Don't underestimate the impact of your physical strength on your emotional strength.
Family. For every joyful experience and every challenge you will go through in life you can be assured your family will be there right along side you. Family can be a large collection of people, most related to you and others not, but regardless "family" means everything in time of need. The generosity that family offers is beyond amazing and one will never fully come to realize just how much individual family members are willing to offer when you need them the most. Beyond the support that family offer to you in a time of need - "family" is also one of the sole reasons for living each day. My children, my husband, my parents, my siblings, my extended family, and my dearest friends are the most important things to me. My commitment to them, my commitment to my health, and the strength it takes all of us as individuals and collectively to get through life is beyond description.
So, I wear these simple rings around my neck now. Every time I touch them or reflect in the mirror - I am reminded of a very real moment where I took the time to reflect on many things that have great impact and importance in my life. My husband is on the mend, and life goes on. But I need to reminded every once and a while to not take these things for granted.
I'm sure over time they will tarnish (they were only $3.98 each at that!) but regardless - for now I am happy with my "make myself feel better" purchase that has come to mean much more than the value of each item.
If you were to choose 4 words to hang around your neck - what would they be? and why?
R
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Warning: Boobs before Love-Handles!
Let's talk about sacrifices.
What are you willing to give up, even lose entirely, for the sake of losing weight or transforming your body? Sure you could consider things like treats, indulgences, etc...but let me remind you of something else you will almost indefinitely find yourself wishing you didn't have to lose....
Highschool and University I was always a 34C. Honestly - I hated them. I always wanted them to be smaller...
Pregnancy and nursing was the most voluptuous phase at an amazing 34EE - this was just awkward.
Post nursing - they shrank in size but not in nipple. But at least I was back down to a 34D - just a little deflated. Finding the right bra that was capable of holding them up where they should be, but that had cups designed well enough to hide the slow deflation that was going on was a nightmare. When I found one - I bought 3 of them.
And then I started working out. My boobs were always the first thing to shrink...or gain (which was always my first indication of being pregnant). When I started bootcamps in May 2010 I was a 34C. Check my card at Bodacious Bustlines and you will find a steady decline in the cup size and band width...picture tube socks with golf balls in the bottom!
28C. And by C - its not a full C - its more like an B but I still need enough room for the tube socks. Good luck finding a bra that doesn't have to be altered to be a 28 but that also has enough cup support. And just when you thought you found the right one...you poke at them and see half the cup is hollow - yet you spilled out of the cup-size down. Or sure - that sexy little B cup looks like it would fit - if they were hard melons not deflated balloons.
How does one solve this problem? Lululemon. Sports bras.
On a daily basis - I am in heaven! My posture is better, my shoulder are back and my pectorals are developing! My "gals" are happily folded into their comfortable, sporty bra. When I look at my silhouette in the mirror - I finally feel like I have the perfect proportions I have always hoped for. Even at my largest size - I always had bras that were firm support, full coverage, and tight. I am the same way now because I have always hated having a "bouncy" chest. As well, with the fact they are pretty much folded into the sports bra, coupled with the cup mold, there is virtually no risk of the oh-so-obvious "nipple stands". I am reminded of highschool and the never ending consciousness that my nipples were on high beams - usually I was non-the-wiser until it was called out in class.
To be quite honest - in that Lululemon sports bra - I feel like myself! Strong and lean and proportional!
Confidence has me exploring new clothing options including a lot of strapless and lower cut shirts...problem is - I cant wear strapless anything without a bra. And finding a dressy, sexy bra that works with dress clothes, strapless tops, and low cut shirts is frustratingly impossible. Not that I dress up often, but when I do, I actually don't want to wear a sports bra. Although I have yet to actually resort to this...duct tape has definitely been considered. Going commando is not an option...too much sag and sway to be tasteful. And who has the time to try all the gimmicks that are in lingerie stores including tape strips and freaky under-bra-bras?
Would I trade my success in losing weight, gaining muscle, and changing my lifestyle for bigger boobs? Not a chance! And there is no way I would purposefully gain back some weight to have fuller boobs again (although I have boxed away all my larger bras for future need if and when...) But there are certain days, certain moments, certain outfits, or certain images that I am faced with that remind me just how much impact boobs have on your femininity. Sigh.
So ladies - don't say I didn't warn you. Everyone will be different - but if there is one thing that is for certain...your boobs are primarily made of fat. And if you are on a mission to lose fat...your body will most likely give up your boobs before it will give up your love-handles.
On the lighter side - enjoy the transformation! Your boobs go through life just as you do! Each stage reflects what you are going through. Although they have shrunk - my husband definitely isn't complaining! And this is mostly because of my confidence and crazy nipple sensitivity (a perk of nursing two babies!)
So don't mourn the loss...embrace it! And if ever one day old age has you cringing when you look in the mirror...you can always buy new ones! ;)
Monday, July 16, 2012
5 Months In: Revisiting the Measurements
February 12, 2012
Weight: 111.2
Age: 29
Body Fat % (recalculated): 12%
Lean Body Mass: 97.86 lbs
Girth Measurements:
Shoulder: 97cm
Chest: 82.6cm
Upper Arm: 23.6cm
Waist: 67.8cm
Hip: 82.5cm
Thigh: 43cm
Calf: 29.5cm
July 12th, 2012
Weight: 115.6
Age: 30
Body Fat % (recalculated): 8.9%
Lean Body Mass: 105.3 lbs
Girth Measurements:
Shoulder: 98cm
Chest: 83cm
Upper Arm: 24.5m
Waist: 73m
Hip: 87cm
Thigh: 44cm
Calf: 30.5cm
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It has been 5 months since I last had my body composition measured. We revisited it on July 12th and I was very happy with the numbers! I knew that changes were happening - based on how I looked in the mirror, clothes, and the way I felt...but sometimes it is nice to see some numbers.
Some comments on them:
1) I lost 3% of my body fat - but gained just over 6lbs of muscle! AWESOME!
2) I gained 1 inch around my biceps...YES!!!! (I LOVE jacked arms!)
3) The numbers show an increase around my waist and hips - which could be contributed to some bloating...or my jacked up abs/glutes! LOL (my trainer didn't seem to think that was the case) Time of day, hydration level, and what is in your gut can affect these numbers as well.
4) We also did some skin-fold caliper measurements...Here are some of those comparables:
- Feb. 12 Abdominal: 9mm July 12 Abdominal: 5mm
- Feb. 12 Chest: 5.3mm July 12 Chest: 2.5mm
- Feb. 12 Suprailliac: 4mm July 12 Suprailliac: 2mm
- Feb. 12 Thigh: 10.5mm July 12 Thigh: 6mm
5) Given the means by which we measured the skin-folds and the calipers - there is room for even more accuracy if we used more precise calipers...so the 8.9% may seem low but in fact it is probably higher. Many women cannot maintain a very low body fat percentage as it starts to effect things like their menstrual cycle. I have not had any changes in that department so I am not concerned with how low that number appears to be.
6) Posture drastically improves with strength training...notice my arms hanging just a little straighter?
7) You can definitely see where I used to store my "fat" - right around the middle. This has everything to do with what I was eating. Lots of sugary foods and carbs. Cutting down on sugar and eating more raw foods and protein has significantly helped with that. I still hold some around there which is why my abs don't look like the washboard they are underneath it all...but I'm not overly concerned about this as my diet could have been a little cleaner too.
So in 5 months of strength training 4 days per week and eating (most of the time) very well - there has been some very positive changes that I am very happy with.
But where to next?
Gain 5 lbs of muscle!!!!!
I hope to get stronger and more agile! I need to improve my mobility and flexibility. And with the continuation of my diet - I hope to see that gain in lean muscle mass!
Healthy Bite-Size Treats
This is a single batch recipe - My suggestion would be to double (or triple) this batch because I promise you they wont last long!
My favorite Combos:
- 2/3 cup oats (you can use gluten free oats if cutting out gluten)
- 2 Tbsp Almond Butter (or any nut butter - peanut, cashew, etc)
- My favorites include:
- Natural PB (no sugar)
- Natural Almond Butter
- MaraNatha Chocolate PB - this just has more sugar and other additives
- If I want chocolate - I just add 1 or 2 Tbsp of cocoa or carob powder to the PB mix
- 1 Tbsp Honey (soft but not melted!)
- 1 Tbsp Coconut Flour
- I really don't suggest using anything else here - coconut flour is a magical and other substitutions haven't worked out as well for me. You can get this at a health food store like Nutters
- 1 Tbsp Coconut Milk
- The canned milk - dont be afraid to use full fat varieties! Found in most grocery stores.
- 1/2 cup dried blueberries (here is where you can get creative! see suggestions below
- I buy dried cherries, blueberries, and cranberries by bulk or from Costco.
- I prefer ones that are unsweetened but don't always have them on hand
- Make sure you keep them in the freezer - chop them up using a blender - and trust me! they chop up better when they are cold/frozen
- Other Fillers
- 1/4-1/2 cup chopped seeds or nuts (see below)
- I had some salted pumpkin seeds on hand - so I put them in the blender too!
- Could use whatever here - but Id say you would want to chop them up in a blender
- 1/4 Cup Mini Choc Chips
- I really like Enjoy Life Mini Chips - found in health food stores
Put everything you want in a bowl together, wash your hands, and start mixing - BY HAND!
Roll into bite size balls - get your kids to help! My girls loved helping and actually enjoyed eating them after because they "made" them! (notice the chipmunk cheeks!?!)
Freeze! (Trust me! You don't want these sitting on your counter! Keep in the fridge or freezer!
Freeze! (Trust me! You don't want these sitting on your counter! Keep in the fridge or freezer!
My favorite Combos:
- PB with Cocoa, Cherries and Mini Choc Chips
- Almond Butter, Blueberries, Pumpkin Seeds
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Another GREAT version but without oats is this and again - play around with the variety of options you can create!:
Another GREAT version but without oats is this and again - play around with the variety of options you can create!:
- 3/4 cup almond flour
- 3 tbsp shredded coconut
- 2 tbsp almond butter
- 1 tbsp coconut flour
- 1 tbsp vanilla
- 1 tbsp honey
- 1 tbsp coconut milk
- 1/2 cup + mini choc chips
Thursday, July 12, 2012
30 Years Old
The big 3-0! Years 28-29 were spent dreading turning 30. Not like I could change it or avoid it but just couldn't accept that I would at some point have to say "I'm 30". There must be a certain sense of maturity or accomplishment when you are 30...just didn't feel I had found whatever it is that might be. Doesn't make any sense does it? Neither does dreading turning 30.
So here is to the next decade! My early 20s were spent partying (geeze these years were fun!). My mid 20s were a blur of moving, new jobs, and babies. It wasn't until my late 20s that I think I finally figured myself out through the blur of all the life changes we went through!
I have made it my mission to make my 30s about finding balance within my life. Time for me to pursue my interests, time for my kids, time for my family and friends, time for my husband and his pursuits, time to develop my business and time for myself. That is a lot to balance...but I figure that is the best part about my 30s! This will be a busy decade - with many ups and downs I know - but surely it cannot be as dreadful as my young self thought it would be.
What's different about being 30 is that you have the maturity to see that you need to live your life well and take care of yourself. Time flies way too fast - and if there is anything I will be constantly pursuing for years to come - it will be my overall health and wellness. My wellness first!
http://www.definitionofwellness.com/
I enjoyed exploring this site because I found that considering my wellness to be a multi-dimensional helped me see the need to find balance between all aspects!
So here is to the next decade! My early 20s were spent partying (geeze these years were fun!). My mid 20s were a blur of moving, new jobs, and babies. It wasn't until my late 20s that I think I finally figured myself out through the blur of all the life changes we went through!
I have made it my mission to make my 30s about finding balance within my life. Time for me to pursue my interests, time for my kids, time for my family and friends, time for my husband and his pursuits, time to develop my business and time for myself. That is a lot to balance...but I figure that is the best part about my 30s! This will be a busy decade - with many ups and downs I know - but surely it cannot be as dreadful as my young self thought it would be.
What's different about being 30 is that you have the maturity to see that you need to live your life well and take care of yourself. Time flies way too fast - and if there is anything I will be constantly pursuing for years to come - it will be my overall health and wellness. My wellness first!
http://www.definitionofwellness.com/
I enjoyed exploring this site because I found that considering my wellness to be a multi-dimensional helped me see the need to find balance between all aspects!
- Social Wellness
- Occupational Wellness
- Spiritual Wellness
- Physical Wellness
- Intellectual Wellness
- Emotional Wellness
- Environmental Wellness
- Financial Wellness
- Mental Wellness
- Medical Wellness
If there is any hope as I start my journey through the next decade is that I never stop pursuing and nurturing my wellness. I am going to use this list of the dimensions of wellness to make some notes about things that I am a) already grateful for and b) changes / additions I'd like to pursue. I owe it to myself and to my family, but what drives me the most is my children. To be there for them as they age, to be active in their lives, and to be a source of inspiration and education about their own wellness is an important job. And although I may not get everything right, I will never give up.
I'm 30! And instead of dread - I feel excitement! I feel younger than I have in a long time and I so very happy with all that I have in my life right now! Who knows what each day will bring - but I feel more equipped to handle it and more stable than ever before!
Friday, July 06, 2012
Rant: Do it right or go home!
So I have to rant...
There is a girl at my gym who I cannot help but compare myself to. To start with - we are about the same size height and weight (she looks leaner than me but I swear my muscles are bigger!). Secondly we both are there to workout, notebook in hand, using many of the same machines.
But that is where it ends.
I struggle with being disappointed in myself for not adding much weight (if ever) to my bars - especially with squats, deadlifts, and bench presses. I have seen some improvement over the last few months, but I am either just comfortable at the weights I am lifting, truly a big sissy, or I'm just not pushing myself hard enough.
Anyway - as I was working hard through my Renegade Rows and Pull-Ups today (which by the way I can now do 4 unassisted pull-ups!) she comes in to set up her squat rack. And as usual - she has an insane amount of weight on the bar...235lbs total to be exact for her first set (to which she drops down from after).
235lbs!!!! WTF! That is almost 3 times her weight! And I am not exaggerating! No wonder I feel weak and unaccomplished with my 115-135lbs that I do.
As she slowly positions herself and comes off the rack...that 235lbs looks like it is going to crush her. I am still not sure I should go far from the rack just in case she ends up smushed underneath the weight. And as she steps out cautiously from the rack into the starting position for her squat, I find myself staring at her in awe and envy. Damn - she must be strong!
Then she does a quarter-squat . Slow and steady. Cautious. 6 times. It almost looked like a bob.
I go back to my rows. What a joke. The day I see her squat down all the way will be the day I go back to envying her strength. Cuz even I know I could shoulder 235lbs and do nothing with it (well ok maybe not quite yet which makes me just a little impressed at her core strength at the very least). I'd like to see her do 135lbs in a full squat - then Ill feel better comparing myself to her.
There are many squat videos - but here is one I found and referred to often.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=40p1qQZTNRw
Same goes for her bench press - to which she had a monstrous 170lbs above her - again I imagined the bar falling on her throat and choking her to death. She held it, threw her leg out to counter-balance herself - then pumped her elbows a few times. No full range of motion. Now - I have to admit I was impressed she even held that kind of weight above her head and could even muster a bend in her elbow - absolutely no way I would even try. SO Ill give her that at the very least. But I'd truly like to see what she is capable of with her full range of motion....Ill continue to work on my technique and full ROM with my measly 60lbs above my head.
A barbell video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSGNxDeUSUE
What I learnt from all this...........Stop comparing yourself to others.
Well ok who are we kidding - I will never really not compare myself to her as long as she works out at the same hour as me...its a mixture of envy, awe, disbelief, and disappointment. That being said - I will never EVER resort to her "technique" just so I can hold the same weight. Might look good from across the room...but once executed it looks more like a joke. In my opinion - do it right or go home. Makes me wonder if it is some training strategy? Maybe a misguided trainer? Macho need to show up to the boys? Who knows. Best I just stop comparing myself to her and focus on my own workouts.
(PS - even most of the guys I watch at the gym dont put that much weight on - they all keep it lower but have envious form)
Im happy enough with how far I have come and how much I have improved my techniques. And Im damn proud of my muscles - especially my arms (to which her's looks like toothpicks in comparison ;p) so I will continue on with my plan and at my own pace. We will see how much another year can bring!
Some advice - YouTube! Find videos that demonstrate PROPER technique - and trust me - you wouldn't find a video of hers as one.
Rant over.
There is a girl at my gym who I cannot help but compare myself to. To start with - we are about the same size height and weight (she looks leaner than me but I swear my muscles are bigger!). Secondly we both are there to workout, notebook in hand, using many of the same machines.
But that is where it ends.
I struggle with being disappointed in myself for not adding much weight (if ever) to my bars - especially with squats, deadlifts, and bench presses. I have seen some improvement over the last few months, but I am either just comfortable at the weights I am lifting, truly a big sissy, or I'm just not pushing myself hard enough.
Anyway - as I was working hard through my Renegade Rows and Pull-Ups today (which by the way I can now do 4 unassisted pull-ups!) she comes in to set up her squat rack. And as usual - she has an insane amount of weight on the bar...235lbs total to be exact for her first set (to which she drops down from after).
235lbs!!!! WTF! That is almost 3 times her weight! And I am not exaggerating! No wonder I feel weak and unaccomplished with my 115-135lbs that I do.
As she slowly positions herself and comes off the rack...that 235lbs looks like it is going to crush her. I am still not sure I should go far from the rack just in case she ends up smushed underneath the weight. And as she steps out cautiously from the rack into the starting position for her squat, I find myself staring at her in awe and envy. Damn - she must be strong!
Then she does a quarter-squat . Slow and steady. Cautious. 6 times. It almost looked like a bob.
I go back to my rows. What a joke. The day I see her squat down all the way will be the day I go back to envying her strength. Cuz even I know I could shoulder 235lbs and do nothing with it (well ok maybe not quite yet which makes me just a little impressed at her core strength at the very least). I'd like to see her do 135lbs in a full squat - then Ill feel better comparing myself to her.
There are many squat videos - but here is one I found and referred to often.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=40p1qQZTNRw
Same goes for her bench press - to which she had a monstrous 170lbs above her - again I imagined the bar falling on her throat and choking her to death. She held it, threw her leg out to counter-balance herself - then pumped her elbows a few times. No full range of motion. Now - I have to admit I was impressed she even held that kind of weight above her head and could even muster a bend in her elbow - absolutely no way I would even try. SO Ill give her that at the very least. But I'd truly like to see what she is capable of with her full range of motion....Ill continue to work on my technique and full ROM with my measly 60lbs above my head.
A barbell video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSGNxDeUSUE
What I learnt from all this...........Stop comparing yourself to others.
Well ok who are we kidding - I will never really not compare myself to her as long as she works out at the same hour as me...its a mixture of envy, awe, disbelief, and disappointment. That being said - I will never EVER resort to her "technique" just so I can hold the same weight. Might look good from across the room...but once executed it looks more like a joke. In my opinion - do it right or go home. Makes me wonder if it is some training strategy? Maybe a misguided trainer? Macho need to show up to the boys? Who knows. Best I just stop comparing myself to her and focus on my own workouts.
(PS - even most of the guys I watch at the gym dont put that much weight on - they all keep it lower but have envious form)
Im happy enough with how far I have come and how much I have improved my techniques. And Im damn proud of my muscles - especially my arms (to which her's looks like toothpicks in comparison ;p) so I will continue on with my plan and at my own pace. We will see how much another year can bring!
Some advice - YouTube! Find videos that demonstrate PROPER technique - and trust me - you wouldn't find a video of hers as one.
Rant over.
Thursday, July 05, 2012
6 Weeks to Spartan - Fear is setting in!
Just over 6 weeks to go before the Spartan Race in Calgary! I keep seeing pictures on their Facebook Page...scares the shit out of me!
The girl in me wants to stay home. Have you seen those pictures? The thought of getting beat to the ground in an arena with some jacked up (ass hole) Spartan with q-tip like beating sticks is about enough to convince me to just stay home. I doubt that any one of them will take pity on a girl in the arena (it's probably the only time they can get away with hitting a girl so why not take advantage of it!)
Nevermind the mud pits and ropes and monkey bars - those I can handle (or do the burpee penalties) but the adult fear of purposefully running straight through an arena where someone is purposefully trying to hit you is against all instinct! My luck I'll be the one hit in the face like this poor guy...then I might have to cry.
I think that this whole event is a way to go outside of my comfort zone and do something worth working hard towards. My intentions are to go do something adventurous with old and new friends and to not die trying. I also hope to gauge the potential for this event to be a future yearly experience or other events like it. This year I want to have fun and complete it...maybe next year I will fight for a spot near the top?
So 6 weeks to go - HOLY SHIT! Of all the things a person should do to get ready for an event like this...mine will have to be to shut off that "girly mom" voice in my head screaming at me that this is not a good idea.
Man up already! Work hard, eat well, sleep, and stop being such a sissy! More than anything I'm looking forward to seeing an old friend and having uninhibited fun for a day! Its all about the experience!
And who knows...maybe my kids will do this someday too! (Well who are we kidding - Bailey won't but Morgan sure would!!!)
 |
| I'd be cowering on the ground... |
 |
| I can handle this...I crawl under my kids beds all the time! |
 |
| Pretty sure the Spartan did that on purpose... |
 |
| Didn't even consider practicing long jump again! |
 |
| Finish the race! |
And who knows...maybe my kids will do this someday too! (Well who are we kidding - Bailey won't but Morgan sure would!!!)
Tuesday, July 03, 2012
Long Weekend Cheats - So worth it!
What a great long weekend!
Long weekend festivities are a true test of willpower! Snacks at the beach, drinks with family and friends, family BBQ meals, birthday cake, and the list could go on. I had no solid intentions going in to this weekend that I was going to avoid anything and everything that I normally cannot eat. I decided that I would leave it up to the moment and what I was feeling like and I knew for sure that I was going to enjoy a beverage or two (or several). So much for being 100% committed to my "diet"!
In regards to the "30-day" plan I am working on...well I cheated on it this weekend again. I mean I knew exactly which rules I was breaking and consciously chose to do so. But on a positive note - I saved up my "Cheat Day" for July 1st which helped me justify some of my choices - sure I probably should have had a sweet potato or rice as my extra carbs but instead I ate chips - oops. All this just means 30-Days is not as easy as one thinks because you have to be committed to it regardless of what else is going on in your life...I don't think Im quite there yet. Apparently I need more of a reason to do it other than just to "try" it. I think when it comes to any change in diet or lifestyle - you have to have a reason to do it that is worth more than the instant (yet short lived) reward you get for cheating.
In regards to eating better over all - this weekend was a success in my opinion - and especially compared to other events I have struggled at. I mean - when have I ever ate more veggies at the beach than treats!?! I thoroughly enjoyed the BBQ'd ribs and roast beef - but skipped the wide array of salads, buns, and extras. And I passed on the cake and ice cream and even limited the amount of fruit I was eating. That all being said - wow! did I ever eat a lot (way too much) nuts, dried cherries, and pepperoni sticks - to which I attribute to habit or boredom - not hunger. I justified my drinks because I mixed them with water or club soda (but probably 3oz instead of 1oz per drink lol) and I probably shouldn't have had that beer and Palm Bay. Oh well.
So I savored every single handful of chips I ate (this was my biggest cheat) and enjoyed my beverages and I come home with no regrets! Well...that was until about 930pm the night we got home....
930pm. Home. I was full beyond belief from the weekend and one last meal at the in-laws. My stomach was bloated to the point I looked 4 months pregnant - and it hurt. My "fat" was hurting...and for those of you who don't believe me - please do! For years now, after drinking and eating poorly, my "fatty" areas (back/love handles, armpit/shoulders) feel like there are a million pins sticking into these areas. Sensitive (if not bordering painful) to the touch, swollen, and uncomfortable. It always shows up about 8-10 hours after a night of drinking (of any volume) and/or eating unhealthy food and lasts well into the next day. It just sucks. And it reminds me every time of why I should consider giving it all up for good....
I'm just not ready to and that is mostly because I haven't found that one reason to give it all up that is worth not eating and drinking things I enjoy on occasion. What will it take? Not sure. Until then - MODERATION is key! Was the "after pain" worth it? This time around...yes. And I enjoyed myself. And I'm ok with all the choices I did make and I can blame no one but myself for them.
But in regards to the 30-Day plan....count that as another fail....so back to Day 1? No. Not this time. Part of any diet is also getting over the mistakes and quickly getting back on track. Day 15 was a cheat day (to which I didnt necessarily follow the rules to entirely) but I am back on plan now and a little more focused. I started over once already but in many ways I shouldn't have even started before the end of this weekend. I had a wedding, a stag, and this weekend - it was set up to fail from the beginning. The 30 days is supposed to be a sort of re-programming for your body and cravings but it is also supposed to help re-establish different habits. That it has helped with for sure. But to be successful for 30 days one has to eliminate the triggers...what is in the pantry and events such as these should be included in my opinion. So Ill finish this off, but I know for sure Ill do it again during a time where I can create more success.
Spartan is 52 days away.
Time to get stronger, faster, and more disciplined.
Long weekend festivities are a true test of willpower! Snacks at the beach, drinks with family and friends, family BBQ meals, birthday cake, and the list could go on. I had no solid intentions going in to this weekend that I was going to avoid anything and everything that I normally cannot eat. I decided that I would leave it up to the moment and what I was feeling like and I knew for sure that I was going to enjoy a beverage or two (or several). So much for being 100% committed to my "diet"!
In regards to the "30-day" plan I am working on...well I cheated on it this weekend again. I mean I knew exactly which rules I was breaking and consciously chose to do so. But on a positive note - I saved up my "Cheat Day" for July 1st which helped me justify some of my choices - sure I probably should have had a sweet potato or rice as my extra carbs but instead I ate chips - oops. All this just means 30-Days is not as easy as one thinks because you have to be committed to it regardless of what else is going on in your life...I don't think Im quite there yet. Apparently I need more of a reason to do it other than just to "try" it. I think when it comes to any change in diet or lifestyle - you have to have a reason to do it that is worth more than the instant (yet short lived) reward you get for cheating.
In regards to eating better over all - this weekend was a success in my opinion - and especially compared to other events I have struggled at. I mean - when have I ever ate more veggies at the beach than treats!?! I thoroughly enjoyed the BBQ'd ribs and roast beef - but skipped the wide array of salads, buns, and extras. And I passed on the cake and ice cream and even limited the amount of fruit I was eating. That all being said - wow! did I ever eat a lot (way too much) nuts, dried cherries, and pepperoni sticks - to which I attribute to habit or boredom - not hunger. I justified my drinks because I mixed them with water or club soda (but probably 3oz instead of 1oz per drink lol) and I probably shouldn't have had that beer and Palm Bay. Oh well.
So I savored every single handful of chips I ate (this was my biggest cheat) and enjoyed my beverages and I come home with no regrets! Well...that was until about 930pm the night we got home....
930pm. Home. I was full beyond belief from the weekend and one last meal at the in-laws. My stomach was bloated to the point I looked 4 months pregnant - and it hurt. My "fat" was hurting...and for those of you who don't believe me - please do! For years now, after drinking and eating poorly, my "fatty" areas (back/love handles, armpit/shoulders) feel like there are a million pins sticking into these areas. Sensitive (if not bordering painful) to the touch, swollen, and uncomfortable. It always shows up about 8-10 hours after a night of drinking (of any volume) and/or eating unhealthy food and lasts well into the next day. It just sucks. And it reminds me every time of why I should consider giving it all up for good....
I'm just not ready to and that is mostly because I haven't found that one reason to give it all up that is worth not eating and drinking things I enjoy on occasion. What will it take? Not sure. Until then - MODERATION is key! Was the "after pain" worth it? This time around...yes. And I enjoyed myself. And I'm ok with all the choices I did make and I can blame no one but myself for them.
But in regards to the 30-Day plan....count that as another fail....so back to Day 1? No. Not this time. Part of any diet is also getting over the mistakes and quickly getting back on track. Day 15 was a cheat day (to which I didnt necessarily follow the rules to entirely) but I am back on plan now and a little more focused. I started over once already but in many ways I shouldn't have even started before the end of this weekend. I had a wedding, a stag, and this weekend - it was set up to fail from the beginning. The 30 days is supposed to be a sort of re-programming for your body and cravings but it is also supposed to help re-establish different habits. That it has helped with for sure. But to be successful for 30 days one has to eliminate the triggers...what is in the pantry and events such as these should be included in my opinion. So Ill finish this off, but I know for sure Ill do it again during a time where I can create more success.
Spartan is 52 days away.
Time to get stronger, faster, and more disciplined.
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Ladies! Get to the gym!
I went to a gym when I was out of town this week...and as usual there was not a single woman in the weight area. Sure there were a few older ladies on the ellipticals but they were not in there for long. To be honest - the only women who walked in to that facility were the ones who were headed for the tanning beds. Kind of pathetic.
Back at my home gym tonight, I took inventory of the people in the gym as I rolled myself out and waited for the squat rack to free up...same inventory of women that are normally there. And trust me when I say - only one of them was actually doing anything productive. A few other familiar faces come in, wander around, do a few bicep curls, crunch out a few ab moves on the floor, and wander off again.
It is quite sad actually.
I have to admit - it took me a while to feel as confident as I do now to OWN my place with the "big boy area". I consider myself a regular at the gym now and I know I am familiar to many of the guys there. I am not as big of a sissy any more and I don't care at all that I share the space with the men. And in watching the men of my gym I have come to the conclusion that they really are not that intimidating at all...nor do they frown upon having women in the area. Of the men that frequent the times that I go to the gym I have been treated with nothing but respect and courtesy. They are there to do their thing...sometimes they talk way too much for my liking and sometimes they grunt a little too unnecessarily but boys will be boys. In fact, most of them I have come to have a huge amount of respect for - in what they are lifting and how polite they are.
Ladies! Get in the gym! I don't mean the cardio classes, I don't mean on the treadmill or elliptical, I don't mean on the mats to do abs....I mean get in the gym and start lifting some weights!!! Use the machines! Pick up the dumbbells! Get on your knees and do some REAL pushups! Just get lifting!
Are you worried about getting bulky? (which I think is the most bogus, uneducated, pathetic excuse out there that women use!) I workout 4 times per week for about 90-120 minutes. I lift as hard as I can and push myself every set. At this point I do not do a minute of cardio during the week. And I'm pretty damn lean and would never ever consider myself to be bulky. In fact, of any of the women in my gym who are there to seriously workout and lift some weights - not one of them is "bulky"! Sorry - it just doesn't really work that way.
Tuffen up! I could just scream when I see some girl (who appears to be thin but with absolutely no muscle definition at all) pick up 5lb dumbbells and do a few bicep curls! WOW - that must really be hard for you! A bag of groceries weighs more than that or the basket of clothes you carry to the laundry every week. Get real women! Pick up a dumbbell that challenges you!!! Push yourself to break a sweat! COME ON! You can do better!!!!
Get real. Sure cardio will make you feel like you are working towards the weight loss I am sure you are trying to achieve...but when in life will you ever need to run 5-10km at a time out of necessity (besides the races you may be working towards)? Yet every single day you are faced with the need to carry weight and support yourself. Lifting groceries, doing laundry, carrying your kids, holding yourself upright 18 hours a day, mowing the lawn, etc etc etc. Lifting weights and doing plyometrics conditions your body for every day life. I used to be that girl who did 4 days of cardio every week (if not more)...and yes I got skinny....as a rail. There was nothing to me. And I thought I was strong...until I started working out at the gym....and it was all to clear that I was a weak, skinny-fat woman. Starting to lift weights and condition my muscles was the absolute best decision I have ever made and the results are far superior to the endless cardio I was doing.
Not sure where to start? Pick up a fitness magazine...every single one of them has a sample plan or monthly plan that can get you started. Browse the web for free plans...the sources are endless. Youtube is great for figuring out how to do something before you get there. Find a Facebook group (message me for the ones I would recommend) - there are several and the members of the groups are amazing sources of inspiration, motivation, and education. Ask a friend who already goes or be so bold and book yourself a trainer to help you get started. But seriously - just get started.
Ill never discourage you from taking group classes or doing some cardio. Any activity is better than no activity. But consider your goals and drop the misconceptions about weight lifting vs cardio. Find a balance between the two at the very least. Minimize your cardio down and start doing High Intensity Intervals instead of long sustained cardio. Run if you want (Ill admit I even miss the leisurely run!) but add in weights! Runners need muscles for speed! Find ways to do some metabolic conditioning and add active rests in to your weight sets to keep the heart rate up. Join a Crossfit gym or take a bootcamp class or join a gym with a "women only" area. The possibilities are endless but your life and all that you do in your life needs you to lift weights - so start exploring those possibilities!!!!
You could go with a friend. My advice - go with a guy friend. Women who go to the gym together talk way too much. Are you there to workout or socialize? If you go with a guy friend - he will work out along side you and keep you on track. And for as much as I may direct this post to women...I know for sure that there are just as many men that have the same challenges as we women do. If you go with a woman - have the plan ready ahead of time! And no! it is not silly to bring in a scribbler and pen to write it all down and keep on track! And for goodness sake - if you come in and wander around and half-ass it with your friend...then you picked the wrong friend. Did you come to workout and get healthy or did you come to wander around and show off your new Lulus?
Please just get over your fears and inhibitions about being in the gym! The men just don't care!!!! Expect that they will check you out (as if you are not checking them out!) - they are curious as to who you are and what you are made of! But they have attention spans that last the duration of a look...and then they are back to work or talking with their buddies. And you have every right to be there as any one else does!!!
It will be hard at first. You will feel uncomfortable and discouraged at times. You may look like you have no clue what you are doing (so do half the other people there who are doing freaky weird things and have terrible form). But I am going to fill you in on a little insider secret....Those of us already in the gym respect you and will gladly share the space with you. We may check you out and watch you at times, and you can expect that we are sizing you up a bit - but don't tell me you are not doing the same about anyone else in there! Don't know what to do or how to work a certain machine? Just ask and someone will gladly show you. And in the end - we all don't really care who you are or why you are there. We are all there to workout in whatever capacity we have planned for the day....which means you will fit right in.
So put your earphones in, lace up your shoes, grab your notebook and water bottle and get in the gym already! You won't regret it! Hope to see you there!
Back at my home gym tonight, I took inventory of the people in the gym as I rolled myself out and waited for the squat rack to free up...same inventory of women that are normally there. And trust me when I say - only one of them was actually doing anything productive. A few other familiar faces come in, wander around, do a few bicep curls, crunch out a few ab moves on the floor, and wander off again.
It is quite sad actually.
I have to admit - it took me a while to feel as confident as I do now to OWN my place with the "big boy area". I consider myself a regular at the gym now and I know I am familiar to many of the guys there. I am not as big of a sissy any more and I don't care at all that I share the space with the men. And in watching the men of my gym I have come to the conclusion that they really are not that intimidating at all...nor do they frown upon having women in the area. Of the men that frequent the times that I go to the gym I have been treated with nothing but respect and courtesy. They are there to do their thing...sometimes they talk way too much for my liking and sometimes they grunt a little too unnecessarily but boys will be boys. In fact, most of them I have come to have a huge amount of respect for - in what they are lifting and how polite they are.
Ladies! Get in the gym! I don't mean the cardio classes, I don't mean on the treadmill or elliptical, I don't mean on the mats to do abs....I mean get in the gym and start lifting some weights!!! Use the machines! Pick up the dumbbells! Get on your knees and do some REAL pushups! Just get lifting!
Are you worried about getting bulky? (which I think is the most bogus, uneducated, pathetic excuse out there that women use!) I workout 4 times per week for about 90-120 minutes. I lift as hard as I can and push myself every set. At this point I do not do a minute of cardio during the week. And I'm pretty damn lean and would never ever consider myself to be bulky. In fact, of any of the women in my gym who are there to seriously workout and lift some weights - not one of them is "bulky"! Sorry - it just doesn't really work that way.
Tuffen up! I could just scream when I see some girl (who appears to be thin but with absolutely no muscle definition at all) pick up 5lb dumbbells and do a few bicep curls! WOW - that must really be hard for you! A bag of groceries weighs more than that or the basket of clothes you carry to the laundry every week. Get real women! Pick up a dumbbell that challenges you!!! Push yourself to break a sweat! COME ON! You can do better!!!!
Get real. Sure cardio will make you feel like you are working towards the weight loss I am sure you are trying to achieve...but when in life will you ever need to run 5-10km at a time out of necessity (besides the races you may be working towards)? Yet every single day you are faced with the need to carry weight and support yourself. Lifting groceries, doing laundry, carrying your kids, holding yourself upright 18 hours a day, mowing the lawn, etc etc etc. Lifting weights and doing plyometrics conditions your body for every day life. I used to be that girl who did 4 days of cardio every week (if not more)...and yes I got skinny....as a rail. There was nothing to me. And I thought I was strong...until I started working out at the gym....and it was all to clear that I was a weak, skinny-fat woman. Starting to lift weights and condition my muscles was the absolute best decision I have ever made and the results are far superior to the endless cardio I was doing.
Not sure where to start? Pick up a fitness magazine...every single one of them has a sample plan or monthly plan that can get you started. Browse the web for free plans...the sources are endless. Youtube is great for figuring out how to do something before you get there. Find a Facebook group (message me for the ones I would recommend) - there are several and the members of the groups are amazing sources of inspiration, motivation, and education. Ask a friend who already goes or be so bold and book yourself a trainer to help you get started. But seriously - just get started.
Ill never discourage you from taking group classes or doing some cardio. Any activity is better than no activity. But consider your goals and drop the misconceptions about weight lifting vs cardio. Find a balance between the two at the very least. Minimize your cardio down and start doing High Intensity Intervals instead of long sustained cardio. Run if you want (Ill admit I even miss the leisurely run!) but add in weights! Runners need muscles for speed! Find ways to do some metabolic conditioning and add active rests in to your weight sets to keep the heart rate up. Join a Crossfit gym or take a bootcamp class or join a gym with a "women only" area. The possibilities are endless but your life and all that you do in your life needs you to lift weights - so start exploring those possibilities!!!!
You could go with a friend. My advice - go with a guy friend. Women who go to the gym together talk way too much. Are you there to workout or socialize? If you go with a guy friend - he will work out along side you and keep you on track. And for as much as I may direct this post to women...I know for sure that there are just as many men that have the same challenges as we women do. If you go with a woman - have the plan ready ahead of time! And no! it is not silly to bring in a scribbler and pen to write it all down and keep on track! And for goodness sake - if you come in and wander around and half-ass it with your friend...then you picked the wrong friend. Did you come to workout and get healthy or did you come to wander around and show off your new Lulus?
Please just get over your fears and inhibitions about being in the gym! The men just don't care!!!! Expect that they will check you out (as if you are not checking them out!) - they are curious as to who you are and what you are made of! But they have attention spans that last the duration of a look...and then they are back to work or talking with their buddies. And you have every right to be there as any one else does!!!
It will be hard at first. You will feel uncomfortable and discouraged at times. You may look like you have no clue what you are doing (so do half the other people there who are doing freaky weird things and have terrible form). But I am going to fill you in on a little insider secret....Those of us already in the gym respect you and will gladly share the space with you. We may check you out and watch you at times, and you can expect that we are sizing you up a bit - but don't tell me you are not doing the same about anyone else in there! Don't know what to do or how to work a certain machine? Just ask and someone will gladly show you. And in the end - we all don't really care who you are or why you are there. We are all there to workout in whatever capacity we have planned for the day....which means you will fit right in.
So put your earphones in, lace up your shoes, grab your notebook and water bottle and get in the gym already! You won't regret it! Hope to see you there!
Monday, June 18, 2012
Back to the Start
Day 22 of 30. Im starting over. Back to Day 1.
Why? Because - I did not commit the way I should have nor the way I originally intended. I had nibbles, a fruit-binge day, and a wedding. Sure - I did much better than before I ever started all this...but I wasn't 100%. Fail.
Part of my fascination with diet changes and program changes is the ability to commit. It amazes me that I can have the best intentions...and still find a way to cheat. Or that regardless of the plan that I have basically told everyone I am following - I can consciously choose to go against it as if there will be no consequences. (PS - Feel free to call Bull Shit when you hear me talking about all this) I think this is more of a social experiment and a battle of willpower vs instant gratification.
So Im starting over. I cannot fully measure the success of the food changes that are included in this plan if in fact I had a few nibbles, a few drinks, the occasional lick of the honey spoon, the bite of my kids bagel, or a few pieces of dessert after the wedding. Each individual one adds up to a huge F A I L.
I learnt a lot in these 22 days.
I learnt that sugar is one of the hardest things to detox from. It is every where. Every commercial. Every magazine. Every aisle at the grocery store. Intentions or not - you are constantly faced with temptation.
I learnt that I really can do without grains. I actually want to completely cut them out as the plan intends and then re-introduce them in a specific and intentional meal (one at a time) to see what grains do to my body and how they actually make me feel.
I learnt that there is a difference between good sugars and bad sugars. Regardless - the plan was to cut it all out with the exception of a piece of fruit or two per day. To say I only had 1-2 pieces with no lick, nibble, or bite of something else would be a lie. So clearly I have not cut out sugar the way my plan challenged me to.
I learnt that this plan has the potential for great success. The changes that I have seen (even with the cheats) have been good. And more days than not I have felt better than I have for a long time.
I learnt that for the long term - my priorities are set. I feel like I have the tools, resources, the knowledge and the willpower to eat different than I have for years...and I feel like I have the self control to have a piece of cookie or a sweet treat occasionally and as I choose or just not at all. But that is not the entire purpose of the 30 days. The purpose is to do it with 100% compliance and then deal with the long term from there.
But I am also results driven. I seriously just want to see what the outcome will be if I am true to the plan. To cheat or to allow exceptions just because is failure from the start. As well I kind of feel like it is a complete disrespect to my trainer who has helped me put this together. As well, all those cheats ruin the validity of the results the plan could have achieved.
And more importantly - I have been fascinated with HOW food makes me feel. The last 22 days I had a superficial insight in to how cutting out sugar can make me feel...but every single cheat nibble, lick, or bite really just ruined the actual understanding of how being sugar free would make me feel. I really want to know how being sugar free, grain free, for 30 days actually feels.
So Im starting over. Nothing like being disappointed in yourself to give it a second try. I find the challenge fun. I marvel at the failures. I laugh at the pathetic excuses I can come up with. Im also sure this wont be the only time I re-start all this. (such confidence!)
So failed attempt #1 aside - I am super excited to retry but with knowledge of how and where I went wrong. I am also very empowered, because cheats aside, I was super proud of myself and the strength of my willpower and self control at recent family gatherings including the wedding. Anyone can do this....you just need to have more willpower and self control than the sugar bug on your shoulder. That being said - there are more family events to come and a camping trip....Im already very worried about the struggle this will be and Im not going to lie - Im sure Ill end up restarting again because of them. On the other hand - maybe not. I shouldn't have this much self-doubt and lack of confidence going in to it - so I am hoping that my scheduled cheat meals and cheat day (as per my plan) will fit strategically in to these events. And going in to them, I also have the power and knowledge I didn't have before which is the failure I am referring to in this post.
It is only 30 days...and apparently much harder than I originally thought. Yet at the same time the past 22 days flew by! So 22 days from now - I hope I have proven to myself that second attempts are worth the effort.
Round 2 started today. So far so good. It always is at first....
Why? Because - I did not commit the way I should have nor the way I originally intended. I had nibbles, a fruit-binge day, and a wedding. Sure - I did much better than before I ever started all this...but I wasn't 100%. Fail.
Part of my fascination with diet changes and program changes is the ability to commit. It amazes me that I can have the best intentions...and still find a way to cheat. Or that regardless of the plan that I have basically told everyone I am following - I can consciously choose to go against it as if there will be no consequences. (PS - Feel free to call Bull Shit when you hear me talking about all this) I think this is more of a social experiment and a battle of willpower vs instant gratification.
So Im starting over. I cannot fully measure the success of the food changes that are included in this plan if in fact I had a few nibbles, a few drinks, the occasional lick of the honey spoon, the bite of my kids bagel, or a few pieces of dessert after the wedding. Each individual one adds up to a huge F A I L.
I learnt a lot in these 22 days.
I learnt that sugar is one of the hardest things to detox from. It is every where. Every commercial. Every magazine. Every aisle at the grocery store. Intentions or not - you are constantly faced with temptation.
I learnt that I really can do without grains. I actually want to completely cut them out as the plan intends and then re-introduce them in a specific and intentional meal (one at a time) to see what grains do to my body and how they actually make me feel.
I learnt that there is a difference between good sugars and bad sugars. Regardless - the plan was to cut it all out with the exception of a piece of fruit or two per day. To say I only had 1-2 pieces with no lick, nibble, or bite of something else would be a lie. So clearly I have not cut out sugar the way my plan challenged me to.
I learnt that this plan has the potential for great success. The changes that I have seen (even with the cheats) have been good. And more days than not I have felt better than I have for a long time.
I learnt that for the long term - my priorities are set. I feel like I have the tools, resources, the knowledge and the willpower to eat different than I have for years...and I feel like I have the self control to have a piece of cookie or a sweet treat occasionally and as I choose or just not at all. But that is not the entire purpose of the 30 days. The purpose is to do it with 100% compliance and then deal with the long term from there.
But I am also results driven. I seriously just want to see what the outcome will be if I am true to the plan. To cheat or to allow exceptions just because is failure from the start. As well I kind of feel like it is a complete disrespect to my trainer who has helped me put this together. As well, all those cheats ruin the validity of the results the plan could have achieved.
And more importantly - I have been fascinated with HOW food makes me feel. The last 22 days I had a superficial insight in to how cutting out sugar can make me feel...but every single cheat nibble, lick, or bite really just ruined the actual understanding of how being sugar free would make me feel. I really want to know how being sugar free, grain free, for 30 days actually feels.
So Im starting over. Nothing like being disappointed in yourself to give it a second try. I find the challenge fun. I marvel at the failures. I laugh at the pathetic excuses I can come up with. Im also sure this wont be the only time I re-start all this. (such confidence!)
So failed attempt #1 aside - I am super excited to retry but with knowledge of how and where I went wrong. I am also very empowered, because cheats aside, I was super proud of myself and the strength of my willpower and self control at recent family gatherings including the wedding. Anyone can do this....you just need to have more willpower and self control than the sugar bug on your shoulder. That being said - there are more family events to come and a camping trip....Im already very worried about the struggle this will be and Im not going to lie - Im sure Ill end up restarting again because of them. On the other hand - maybe not. I shouldn't have this much self-doubt and lack of confidence going in to it - so I am hoping that my scheduled cheat meals and cheat day (as per my plan) will fit strategically in to these events. And going in to them, I also have the power and knowledge I didn't have before which is the failure I am referring to in this post.
It is only 30 days...and apparently much harder than I originally thought. Yet at the same time the past 22 days flew by! So 22 days from now - I hope I have proven to myself that second attempts are worth the effort.
Round 2 started today. So far so good. It always is at first....
Sunday, June 10, 2012
Surviving the Backyard BBQ
The season of backyard BBQs, patio drinks, and late night bonfires. Most festivities include an assortment of beverages, most including alcohol. And lets not forget chips, cookies, creamy dips for veggies, macaroni salads, and buns just to name a few. You know what your favorites are!
The BBQ season is not an easy season to get through if you are trying to change the way you eat. I am already salivating just writing all that above and reminiscing on the spread of food that has been set out before me to enjoy before. Regardless of my own personal diet changes and all the things that are on my "DO NOT EAT" list (all mentioned above) I cannot expect everyone to eat like me and to not put such things out.
It is all actually relatively easy - it just takes some planning.
1) Bring a dish. For me this is a salad. Unique and flavorful,something new to try, an experiment. I know what is in that dish and I know it is something I can eat - in abundance. You need something to fill up on so you don't reach for the things you are actually craving. If you are like me - I usually end up bringing more than just one dish - mostly because there are so many I want to try and finally have a crowd to experiment on!
2) Perrier and Frozen Fruit. Cut up some lemons and limes and freeze them on a tray. Put some berries in ice cube trays and top up with water - freeze. Once you have your ice cubes - add them to water, or if you want some bubbly - Perrier or Pres. Choice has a great brand that is unsweetened. (Avoid flavored water that is sweetened with sucrose). In a room of drinkers - this looks like a drink! Bubbly, classy (put it in a clear glass instead of Red Solo), and tasty.
3) Bring a snack you can munch on (I feel this is actually the most important thing I need to remember!). After supper there is always an assortment of chips. Dammit it anyway. One of my biggest weakness! And "healthy" chips do not really exist. SO what is a girl to do? Bring a bag (or even enough to share) of nuts, dried fruit, or even beef jerky. That late night need to crunch is overwhelming! So when I had to ask my friend for a handful of almonds last night - it dawned on me that I need to come a little more prepared (more than I thought I already was!). Nuts at least helps with the crunch! Or bring Kale - toast it up in the oven and have Kale chips. Jerky is always a good choice - but don't let them see it if you didnt bring enough to share!
4) Say NO to the bun! Period. Stack your meat as you would but without the bun. Use mustard and hot peppers and dijon. But NO BUN. For me this is partly because of my plan but there are also other reasons why I have stopped with the buns. Unneeded calories, wrong kind of calories that I want, dense, way too much in comparison to the meat, want to save room for other things, I usually end up picking off the excess and throwing out anyway, etc etc etc. Forget the bun. Enjoy the meat!
5) Change your attitude. I find that the more I change my attitude before going (and daily) the less struggle I have. I always fear family/friend events when I'm working towards changing things. Every event is predictably the same - with the same spread of food and drink.
The BBQ season is not an easy season to get through if you are trying to change the way you eat. I am already salivating just writing all that above and reminiscing on the spread of food that has been set out before me to enjoy before. Regardless of my own personal diet changes and all the things that are on my "DO NOT EAT" list (all mentioned above) I cannot expect everyone to eat like me and to not put such things out.
It is all actually relatively easy - it just takes some planning.
1) Bring a dish. For me this is a salad. Unique and flavorful,something new to try, an experiment. I know what is in that dish and I know it is something I can eat - in abundance. You need something to fill up on so you don't reach for the things you are actually craving. If you are like me - I usually end up bringing more than just one dish - mostly because there are so many I want to try and finally have a crowd to experiment on!
2) Perrier and Frozen Fruit. Cut up some lemons and limes and freeze them on a tray. Put some berries in ice cube trays and top up with water - freeze. Once you have your ice cubes - add them to water, or if you want some bubbly - Perrier or Pres. Choice has a great brand that is unsweetened. (Avoid flavored water that is sweetened with sucrose). In a room of drinkers - this looks like a drink! Bubbly, classy (put it in a clear glass instead of Red Solo), and tasty.
3) Bring a snack you can munch on (I feel this is actually the most important thing I need to remember!). After supper there is always an assortment of chips. Dammit it anyway. One of my biggest weakness! And "healthy" chips do not really exist. SO what is a girl to do? Bring a bag (or even enough to share) of nuts, dried fruit, or even beef jerky. That late night need to crunch is overwhelming! So when I had to ask my friend for a handful of almonds last night - it dawned on me that I need to come a little more prepared (more than I thought I already was!). Nuts at least helps with the crunch! Or bring Kale - toast it up in the oven and have Kale chips. Jerky is always a good choice - but don't let them see it if you didnt bring enough to share!
4) Say NO to the bun! Period. Stack your meat as you would but without the bun. Use mustard and hot peppers and dijon. But NO BUN. For me this is partly because of my plan but there are also other reasons why I have stopped with the buns. Unneeded calories, wrong kind of calories that I want, dense, way too much in comparison to the meat, want to save room for other things, I usually end up picking off the excess and throwing out anyway, etc etc etc. Forget the bun. Enjoy the meat!
5) Change your attitude. I find that the more I change my attitude before going (and daily) the less struggle I have. I always fear family/friend events when I'm working towards changing things. Every event is predictably the same - with the same spread of food and drink.
- Attitude change #1: What am I here for? The food/drink or the people?
- Attitude change #2: No one cares what I eat or drink - they may question it or make comments but in the end they just don't care. Why let myself fall apart for the sake of the food on the counter?
- Attitude change #3: Drinking is not mandatory - it's optional. Just because I always said yes to a drink before doesn't mean I have to now. Just accept that people will keep asking if you are pregnant or to explain why you are not drinking. I hate having to explain myself so a simple "not now thanks" or "maybe later" or "I'm driving" or whatever...Drinking is optional. And to be quite honest - I've come to realize I just don't need that drink. What I may be getting at is that I want to drink because I WANT to, whether on impulse or for a special event, but to just have a few may not be worth it.
- Attitude change #4: It is not worth it. You will never feel good about that piece of cake or bowl of chips so just don't eat it. The taste-bud, sugar high is not worth the disappointment you will have in yourself. So eat what you know makes you feel good and what is worth it to you. Those treats will always be there next time if you really want to have them.
Lastly - it comes down to the fact that I am trying to make a lifestyle change. And my lifestyle includes these types of events so it has to be known that changing the choices I make at these events is necessary too. Period. I can't feel good about my choices, talk about them, encourage others to start to live healthier themselves, and then fall apart at a backyard BBQ. Not only would I prove I'm full of shit but I feel whatever respect/curiosity people had for the changes I talk about is diminished. So it is really important to me that I learn to change my choices - outside and within all these types of events - to keep working towards my long term goals of a healthier lifestyle and to prove my commitment to myself.
And would you believe it? I had a great visit last night with my friends!
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