When you spend a day in the bush or on a search you are bound to have to pee.
Right! Like its that easy.
Ladies can relate to this and it is easier said than done. I like to consider myself an independent pisser - I do not need someone to come with me to pee in the bush...but there is something about having a spotter or at least confirmation that I am out of bare-ass-visual or audio range. Plus - you wonder the whole way if you should face the direction of the group to alert any unknowing person coming your way - or turn your pack to the group with your ass exposed to the world? Finding a strategic bush or cluster of trees to squat behind can be tricky and sometimes quite a distance from the group...and when you are as directionally challenged as I am in dense trees....the further you get the more you worry about being the "girl who got lost taking a pee". And nothing like the gut-wrenching fear you will come back to the group with the obvious indication that you didn't squat low enough nor did you manage to keep your feet (which are trapped by your pants around your ankles) far enough from the discharge. And one must not forget the challenge of avoiding nasty plants that cause rashes or that have thorns, insects buzzing around your ass, and rough uneven terrain!
Fears and challenges aside - you just have no choice. Push the limits of your bladder and you will regret your insecurities. You become more comfortable as time goes on. You remind the men of the group of the fact they have it far too easy and should at least be sympathetic to our challenges (and to keep their chuckles to themselves). You find tricks like leaning against a tree in a squat (who needs a toilet anyway) and you make a plan with your closest spotter-friends. In the end - you just do it. But it would be unwise to limit how much you drink and hold it for too long...so you just commit yourself to peeing in the bush much to your body's relief!
Peeing in the bush is like this new venture I am starting.
1) It is something I am scared to do but know its a something worth it.
2) The process of actually peeing in the bush is quite similar to starting a new wellness plan - you have to recognize the need, make a plan, identify your challenges, ask for help and make the commitment to do it.
So just as peeing in the bush is inevitable - so to is the need to improve my overall wellness. Although a much more elaborate task - the importance is undeniable.
I pee because my body requires it (and ignoring that would result in embarrassment)- regardless of the challenges and insecurities. And I WILL workout and eat healthy and explore new approaches to whole-body wellness because my future requires it (and I won't be embarrassed) - regardless of the challenges and insecurities.
~ Rebecca
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Let me fit you in...
Scheduling. What a fun task! I love it to be honest - and the more variables the better.
But I am terrible at scheduling play time and alone time.
Alone time - not just time to work quietly by myself or to read an e-book on my phone...but real alone time that has no electronic interference and no real purpose. Sure a pedicure is a great treat - but its not really alone time. And who doesn't love the opportunity to wander around a mall, without kids, with a coffee in hand - free to browse as you desire. But that really isn't the alone time I'm talking of. I mean the alone time that you take for 15 minutes in the day to breathe, close your eyes, and just think about things outside of your obligations. One might call this a nap - but whatever you may call it - 15 minutes of quiet time is a very precious commodity...and if it means locking yourself in a dark closet while playing hide-and-go-seek...well you do what you got to do. And no - I don't think sitting on the toilet counts for this too...but take it where you can get it! ;)
Self-Indulgences. What would you do with an hour to yourself that cannot include chores, obligatory shopping, or fitness. I love getting my hair done - that's 2 hours for chatting and pampering. Or meet for coffee. Or wander the mall looking for things just for me. I do these things all the time - and THOROUGHLY enjoy and appreciate them. But I have a whole list of other things I'd like to do for myself but never do. This list includes such simple pleasures as: pedicure, tan, massage, read a book in a bookstore, etc etc etc. I think I am going to start putting some of those things a little higher up on my list - at the sacrifice of a mall-wander....can't have it all but I can re-prioritize.
Play time - as a busy mother I am all too guilty for finding something that has to be baked, cooked, prepared for tomorrow, fixed, cleaned, organized, put away, found, made, and hidden. Having been home a little more lately, it dawned on me that I don't schedule play time with my kids or relationship time with my husband because I have let all the other things come first. It doesn't mean I don't love my kids - I just didn't seem to put such simple things first. And why wouldn't I? Cleaning the floors or building a fort? Like seriously - which sounds like more fun?!??!
So - because I cannot just allow myself to play all day - I have started setting a time of the day that I drop everything to play. I try for once in the morning and once in the afternoon if I am home. And little does he know but I have a whole list of things I'd like to do with my husband on a "date" that does not include going to a movie. So for once, I actually feel relaxed...like I look forward to 3pm to play with my kids. And you know what - all those other things can wait until I return.
I know there will be some days that this might not be able to happen but regardless, I am here for my kids and am so very grateful that they are independent and creative in their own ways that they can make do without my full attention. But I owe it to them to try more than I have in the past. Its humbling to realize you are not doing the things you thought or assumed you would with your kids...
So - I have scheduled play time. And it feels great!
But I am terrible at scheduling play time and alone time.
Alone time - not just time to work quietly by myself or to read an e-book on my phone...but real alone time that has no electronic interference and no real purpose. Sure a pedicure is a great treat - but its not really alone time. And who doesn't love the opportunity to wander around a mall, without kids, with a coffee in hand - free to browse as you desire. But that really isn't the alone time I'm talking of. I mean the alone time that you take for 15 minutes in the day to breathe, close your eyes, and just think about things outside of your obligations. One might call this a nap - but whatever you may call it - 15 minutes of quiet time is a very precious commodity...and if it means locking yourself in a dark closet while playing hide-and-go-seek...well you do what you got to do. And no - I don't think sitting on the toilet counts for this too...but take it where you can get it! ;)
Self-Indulgences. What would you do with an hour to yourself that cannot include chores, obligatory shopping, or fitness. I love getting my hair done - that's 2 hours for chatting and pampering. Or meet for coffee. Or wander the mall looking for things just for me. I do these things all the time - and THOROUGHLY enjoy and appreciate them. But I have a whole list of other things I'd like to do for myself but never do. This list includes such simple pleasures as: pedicure, tan, massage, read a book in a bookstore, etc etc etc. I think I am going to start putting some of those things a little higher up on my list - at the sacrifice of a mall-wander....can't have it all but I can re-prioritize.
Play time - as a busy mother I am all too guilty for finding something that has to be baked, cooked, prepared for tomorrow, fixed, cleaned, organized, put away, found, made, and hidden. Having been home a little more lately, it dawned on me that I don't schedule play time with my kids or relationship time with my husband because I have let all the other things come first. It doesn't mean I don't love my kids - I just didn't seem to put such simple things first. And why wouldn't I? Cleaning the floors or building a fort? Like seriously - which sounds like more fun?!??!
So - because I cannot just allow myself to play all day - I have started setting a time of the day that I drop everything to play. I try for once in the morning and once in the afternoon if I am home. And little does he know but I have a whole list of things I'd like to do with my husband on a "date" that does not include going to a movie. So for once, I actually feel relaxed...like I look forward to 3pm to play with my kids. And you know what - all those other things can wait until I return.
I know there will be some days that this might not be able to happen but regardless, I am here for my kids and am so very grateful that they are independent and creative in their own ways that they can make do without my full attention. But I owe it to them to try more than I have in the past. Its humbling to realize you are not doing the things you thought or assumed you would with your kids...
So - I have scheduled play time. And it feels great!
Shortly after this picture Morgan went down the hill, aiming for a large "bump" in the hill - only to go head first into the side of it. Poor kid. Shortly after that...she was wiped out by another kid zooming down the hill. My laughter didn't help the situation...
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Sip Away
I hate drinking water.
And for years I have proven that I don't really NEED 8 glasses of water a day (I have been this way for as long as I can remember). The thought of even drinking that much makes me feel like drowning!
Now they say "glasses" refers to 8oz of fluid (approx. 1 cup). Now when I put it like that it doesn't sound so bad. But if you do the simple math - 8 cups of water is 2 liters...and now I'm drowning.
2 liters. Just for daily functioning and normal health.
4-5 liters. Often consumed by fitness buffs and the eternally parched.
Some say they crave it. Can't live without it. I cannot sympathize with these feelings...I feel like drowning.
But you know what? I am healthy. I drink other things (including too many cups of coffee) and I eat my weight in fruits and veggies weekly. I drink more when I'm most active and less when I'm "busy". I don't crave water - and when I do I know that means I'm getting really parched so I do something about it. So who is to say that I am dehydrated? I feel fine. I have been this way for years with no debilitating side effects (that I know of). I don't have any obvious signs of it...but I'm sure my optometrist would say otherwise. Regardless...this is not an easy thing to change!
So I am struggling with finding a manageable approach that will fool my brain into curbing this overwhelming desire to barf when I think of anything more than my 500ml cup. Here are a few of my strategies I'm going to try:
1) Drink out of a 250ml (1 cup) glass...Why? Because 1 cup at a time seems far less dangerous than a 1liter water bottle full of that clear fluid that even a small child could drown in.
2) Drink out of that 1cup glass every hour (when at home at least)...I'm going to set my stop watch for 60minutes. In an 8 hour day I should have this accomplished...Should have. Better remind myself to not push the snooze button and skip an hour - only to have 2 cups to make up on the next!
3) Put ice and 500ml of water into a child's cup with a lid and straw...sip away for an hour and then replenish! If I do this - then I would only need to do this 4 times in the day!
4) If I have done all of this and can finish that...Ill do an extra 8oz for good measure just before bed (and since my bladder is like a camel I won't be up mid-night anyway)
5) When I'm working - small 500ml bottles of water with a straw. One for the morning half. One for the afternoon half. I'll have to make up the rest at home.
What are my fears or reservations about water?
- 2 liters is a lot to drink when you look at how much that actually is. Let alone 4 or 5 liters. I gag just thinking about it.
- I hate to drink when teaching...I hate feeling like people are watching you take a drink and criticizing your swallowing technique. Seriously. Just ask anyone in my family...we used to nag each other about our drinking and swallowing habits. Scarred for life.
- I cannot burp. Not at all. Not even if I tried. Do you know how hard it is to feel water logged and not be able to burp? Do you know how embarrassing it is to have people hear your "gurgle bubbles" rising up from your stomach but with no awe-inspiring belch at the end?
- I HATE HATE HATE having to interrupt something to go to the bathroom. Hate it. I feel such a sense of accomplishment if I have gone 8 hours without a bathroom break...and still feel in control. And no - I don't have any bladder issues (yet...)
- I have not experienced the physical necessity to drink more than I already do. It may not be considered healthy but I am not experiencing any direct negative effects of not drinking 2+liters per day...so why change now. Doesn't this sound like an excuse a smoker would use?
I recognize that I need to drink more. In fact, I actually am going to give this an honest effort. If I ease into it I may actually enjoy some of the benefits I think this may have for me:
- better skin and hair
- less snacking and grazing on junk when I'm home
- maybe my contacts wouldn't bother me so much mid-day
I'm going to try. I can honestly say this may be one of my biggest challenges! But part of my goals for this year is to set attainable goals and strive to achieve them. Who would have thought something as simple as drinking the elixir of life would be such a daunting task!
Wish me luck! And let me know your tips on how you get it all down without drowning.
And for those of you who think I'm a little crazy...read up on risks associated with drinking water:
- Secondary Drowning and asphyxiation - be careful not to cough/breathe and swallow at the same time!
- Water Intoxication - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Water_intoxication
Rebecca
And for years I have proven that I don't really NEED 8 glasses of water a day (I have been this way for as long as I can remember). The thought of even drinking that much makes me feel like drowning!
Now they say "glasses" refers to 8oz of fluid (approx. 1 cup). Now when I put it like that it doesn't sound so bad. But if you do the simple math - 8 cups of water is 2 liters...and now I'm drowning.
2 liters. Just for daily functioning and normal health.
4-5 liters. Often consumed by fitness buffs and the eternally parched.
Some say they crave it. Can't live without it. I cannot sympathize with these feelings...I feel like drowning.
But you know what? I am healthy. I drink other things (including too many cups of coffee) and I eat my weight in fruits and veggies weekly. I drink more when I'm most active and less when I'm "busy". I don't crave water - and when I do I know that means I'm getting really parched so I do something about it. So who is to say that I am dehydrated? I feel fine. I have been this way for years with no debilitating side effects (that I know of). I don't have any obvious signs of it...but I'm sure my optometrist would say otherwise. Regardless...this is not an easy thing to change!
So I am struggling with finding a manageable approach that will fool my brain into curbing this overwhelming desire to barf when I think of anything more than my 500ml cup. Here are a few of my strategies I'm going to try:
1) Drink out of a 250ml (1 cup) glass...Why? Because 1 cup at a time seems far less dangerous than a 1liter water bottle full of that clear fluid that even a small child could drown in.
2) Drink out of that 1cup glass every hour (when at home at least)...I'm going to set my stop watch for 60minutes. In an 8 hour day I should have this accomplished...Should have. Better remind myself to not push the snooze button and skip an hour - only to have 2 cups to make up on the next!
3) Put ice and 500ml of water into a child's cup with a lid and straw...sip away for an hour and then replenish! If I do this - then I would only need to do this 4 times in the day!
4) If I have done all of this and can finish that...Ill do an extra 8oz for good measure just before bed (and since my bladder is like a camel I won't be up mid-night anyway)
5) When I'm working - small 500ml bottles of water with a straw. One for the morning half. One for the afternoon half. I'll have to make up the rest at home.
What are my fears or reservations about water?
- 2 liters is a lot to drink when you look at how much that actually is. Let alone 4 or 5 liters. I gag just thinking about it.
- I hate to drink when teaching...I hate feeling like people are watching you take a drink and criticizing your swallowing technique. Seriously. Just ask anyone in my family...we used to nag each other about our drinking and swallowing habits. Scarred for life.
- I cannot burp. Not at all. Not even if I tried. Do you know how hard it is to feel water logged and not be able to burp? Do you know how embarrassing it is to have people hear your "gurgle bubbles" rising up from your stomach but with no awe-inspiring belch at the end?
- I HATE HATE HATE having to interrupt something to go to the bathroom. Hate it. I feel such a sense of accomplishment if I have gone 8 hours without a bathroom break...and still feel in control. And no - I don't have any bladder issues (yet...)
- I have not experienced the physical necessity to drink more than I already do. It may not be considered healthy but I am not experiencing any direct negative effects of not drinking 2+liters per day...so why change now. Doesn't this sound like an excuse a smoker would use?
I recognize that I need to drink more. In fact, I actually am going to give this an honest effort. If I ease into it I may actually enjoy some of the benefits I think this may have for me:
- better skin and hair
- less snacking and grazing on junk when I'm home
- maybe my contacts wouldn't bother me so much mid-day
I'm going to try. I can honestly say this may be one of my biggest challenges! But part of my goals for this year is to set attainable goals and strive to achieve them. Who would have thought something as simple as drinking the elixir of life would be such a daunting task!
Wish me luck! And let me know your tips on how you get it all down without drowning.
And for those of you who think I'm a little crazy...read up on risks associated with drinking water:
- Secondary Drowning and asphyxiation - be careful not to cough/breathe and swallow at the same time!
- Water Intoxication - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Water_intoxication
Rebecca
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
The Rusty Treadmill's Spark
So I decided it's about time to get back in to my old routine of working out after 2+ months of excuses and plain old laziness...
At first I felt great! I ran for 20 minutes on my treadmill at my comfort zone of 7.0mph - and at about the 10 minute mark my mind started shouting out every excuse in the book as to why I should quit. Being that I never turn down a good argument - I kept at it until 20 minutes were up and decided that I really shouldn't over do it on my first day back.
This was a sneaky way of saying that 20 minutes was physically taxing and it was not mentally worth the fight to push harder for any longer. Shame on me. 3 months ago I was running 10km in the 52minute range...and 20minutes now was a struggle. Shame. On. Me.
So after that I decided I had planned to do some chest / back exercises on my Rip:60. I did. Half-assed. Lame. Finger wagging shame!
So here is what I have learnt:
- Time off is needed for the body and mind - but "time off" for me needs to be a change in routine or intensity...not going cold-turkey for 2+ months. The set back is honestly shameful for me - BUT I am going to use this as motivational fuel!
- I need a plan. Period. A plan that goes beyond something I slapped together today to try tonight. I need a PLAN! A daily, weekly, monthly plan that incorporates short term and long term strategies. I need to know that one phase will lead to another. And this plan needs to include the whole picture - exercise, nutrition, goals, lifestyle, priorities...not just exercise. More on this soon.
After I came upstairs to help finish making supper - I left the shame I was feeling in front of my rusty treadmill at the basement doorway. Screw it. What am I ashamed for? I got lazy. It is no one else's fault but my own and only I can change it. So I will. With a plan.
I decided that my plan will start if I do 5 things (and probably 20 more I haven't got to yet):
1) Stop making excuses. No - I am not that busy. Yes - I can get up earlier. No - You can't eat whatever you want. No - it is not because of the holidays and PS they are OVER!
2) Stop letting others influence my poor choices. The thing I hate hearing the most (because it fuels the excuses already floating around in my head) is that I don't need to workout or watch what I eat because of my body size right now. It has nothing to do with that!!!!! But yet hearing that justifies my lame excuses.
3) Define my goals and get a plan together. I'm working on this and I promise to share as it develops.
4) Be transparent. I have insecurities too. I also don't hate my body but I don't feel comfortable showing it off. So before and after pictures will be posted soon.
5) Be honest and critical of myself - but always try to turn such criticism into something to be used to help me on this new endeavor.
So back to the shame. I'm now convinced this is more embarrassment and disappointment in myself. Whatever it is - it wont last long. Nothing like a pathetic run on a rusty treadmill to put a "spark in my ass".
Fun Fact: Urban Dictionary's phrase on January 12: "Spark in my ass" - A sudden burst of positive energy; determined; a feeling of invincibility.
~ Rebecca ~
At first I felt great! I ran for 20 minutes on my treadmill at my comfort zone of 7.0mph - and at about the 10 minute mark my mind started shouting out every excuse in the book as to why I should quit. Being that I never turn down a good argument - I kept at it until 20 minutes were up and decided that I really shouldn't over do it on my first day back.
This was a sneaky way of saying that 20 minutes was physically taxing and it was not mentally worth the fight to push harder for any longer. Shame on me. 3 months ago I was running 10km in the 52minute range...and 20minutes now was a struggle. Shame. On. Me.
So after that I decided I had planned to do some chest / back exercises on my Rip:60. I did. Half-assed. Lame. Finger wagging shame!
So here is what I have learnt:
- Time off is needed for the body and mind - but "time off" for me needs to be a change in routine or intensity...not going cold-turkey for 2+ months. The set back is honestly shameful for me - BUT I am going to use this as motivational fuel!
- I need a plan. Period. A plan that goes beyond something I slapped together today to try tonight. I need a PLAN! A daily, weekly, monthly plan that incorporates short term and long term strategies. I need to know that one phase will lead to another. And this plan needs to include the whole picture - exercise, nutrition, goals, lifestyle, priorities...not just exercise. More on this soon.
After I came upstairs to help finish making supper - I left the shame I was feeling in front of my rusty treadmill at the basement doorway. Screw it. What am I ashamed for? I got lazy. It is no one else's fault but my own and only I can change it. So I will. With a plan.
I decided that my plan will start if I do 5 things (and probably 20 more I haven't got to yet):
1) Stop making excuses. No - I am not that busy. Yes - I can get up earlier. No - You can't eat whatever you want. No - it is not because of the holidays and PS they are OVER!
2) Stop letting others influence my poor choices. The thing I hate hearing the most (because it fuels the excuses already floating around in my head) is that I don't need to workout or watch what I eat because of my body size right now. It has nothing to do with that!!!!! But yet hearing that justifies my lame excuses.
3) Define my goals and get a plan together. I'm working on this and I promise to share as it develops.
4) Be transparent. I have insecurities too. I also don't hate my body but I don't feel comfortable showing it off. So before and after pictures will be posted soon.
5) Be honest and critical of myself - but always try to turn such criticism into something to be used to help me on this new endeavor.
So back to the shame. I'm now convinced this is more embarrassment and disappointment in myself. Whatever it is - it wont last long. Nothing like a pathetic run on a rusty treadmill to put a "spark in my ass".
Fun Fact: Urban Dictionary's phrase on January 12: "Spark in my ass" - A sudden burst of positive energy; determined; a feeling of invincibility.
~ Rebecca ~
Monday, January 16, 2012
Recognizing the desire to improve...
Wikipedia defines "wellness" as a term generally used to mean a healthy balance of the mind, body, and spirit that results in an overall feeling of well-being.
My 20's were jam-packed full of life events - all of which I wouldn't change a thing about. But in my 20's I was also very naive - taking for granted many things like my health and overall wellness. I didn't just take my wellness for granted - I just down right ignored the fact that it existed.
My 20's were jam-packed full of life events - all of which I wouldn't change a thing about. But in my 20's I was also very naive - taking for granted many things like my health and overall wellness. I didn't just take my wellness for granted - I just down right ignored the fact that it existed.
Now, on the verge of turning 30, I have decided to re-evaluate what affects my well-being and focus on improving my overall health for the next decade to come - one day, one goal, one month at a time.
The focus of my quest for a more healthy balance and improved wellness at this point is on 2 key areas:
1) Fitness and Diet - setting attainable goals, pushing myself out of my comfort zone, eating healthy and not giving in to excuses.
2) Relationships - spending more time with my husband and children, exploring new things to experience with them, and nurturing friendships important to me.
I have no idea what I am doing. I just have an overwhelming desire to do something.
This blog is my way of staying accountable to myself. And if anyone else shares in my challenges and aspirations I hope we can grow a support network we can all rely on.
I either do it or I don't.
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